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I Fought The Law, and the Law Won- aka "Stupid Criminal of the Week"

Discussion in 'Crimes' started by Sunburst, Nov 3, 2017.

  1. Uno2Much

    Uno2Much Bronze Member

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  2. Paradise

    Paradise Media Mod

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  3. Uno2Much

    Uno2Much Bronze Member

    Men stole huge, 25-foot shed — and got caught dragging it down a road, Maine cops say
    May 22, 2018 04:56 PM

    The huge, 25-foot-long white shed would have — admittedly — been tough to hide.

    But the three men in Lebanon, Maine, who stole the shed Sunday found a surefire way to get caught, according to Maine State Police. They dragged the stolen property through the street, blocking half of the roadway, police said.


    Read more: http://www.miamiherald.com/news/nation-world/national/article211684244.html
  4. Cousin Dupree

    Cousin Dupree Platinum Member

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  5. Uno2Much

    Uno2Much Bronze Member

    First, Shawn Harris broke the law and was stopped by the liquor store owner. Doesn't look like he'll have much luck either with his lawsuit in federal court to compensate him for his injuries. I don't think typos are the problem. I wish I knew the liquor store owner's actual name. But, Harris's name for the liquor store is a hoot. :giggle:

    Thief in NY files typo-filled lawsuit after he was shot while robbing store
    By Kathianne Boniello

    He’s a lousy crook — and an even worse jailhouse lawyer.

    A bumbling Long Island liquor-store thief who got caught stuffing bottles of hooch in his pants, only to be shot by the store’s owner as he tried to get away, wants $2.7 million for his injuries.

    In the handwritten lawsuit he filed himself, Harris describes in detail how he and a pal ripped off the store on Newbridge Road in North Bellmore, LI, in August 2016, starting in the “Hennesey [sic] and Patron section.”

    “During this the store owner shoots my friend and he confronted me outside the car and shot me also and I ran off,” Harris writes. “I was shot by Lan Dong Dong in my right shoulder and I did not receive medical treatment because I was scared of Getting Arrested . . . so I did my own medical treatment.”

    But the theft actually occurred at a store called Newbridge Wine & Liquors, in North Bellmore — not Grapes & Grains, and Lan Dong Dong isn’t the owner who shot Harris, according to reports.

    Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/05/27/thief-in-ny-sues-after-being-shot-while-robbing-store.html
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  6. Sunburst

    Sunburst Bronze Member

    The jailhouse lawyer has a fool for a client.
    Paradise, Uno2Much and Cousin Dupree like this.
  7. Paradise

    Paradise Media Mod

    Soldier Leads Virginia Police on Bonkers Mid-Speed Chase in Stolen Armored Veh
    The Future of BattleBots
    5/09/18 4:43pm

    Virginia State Police arrested a soldier from the National Guard base at Fort Pickett in Blackstone on Tuesday after they fled in a stolen armored vehicle, WTVR reports, leading cops on what appears to have been about as close to a high-speed chase the trooper could achieve at the vehicle’s maximum speed of 40 miles per hour.

    According to WTVR, charges are pending against the suspect who led officers on the chase.

    According to WTVR, the soldier in question is believed to be an officer of the Virginia Army National Guard and drove the unarmed vehicle from Nottoway County to I-85 to I-95 in Richmond:

    State Police says at 7:55 p.m., they were notified that the vehicle, which is not equipped with a weapon, was taken from Fort Pickett, a National Guard base in Blackstone. They pursued the vehicle after receiving the initial report and traveled along with it from Nottoway County to downtown Richmond.

    A witness, who saw part of the pursuit play out on West Broad Street near VCU, says he knew something was wrong when he heard the thunderous sound of the military vehicle.

    “It just seemed like something out of a movie. I heard a large vehicle, it sounded like a tank, but it was moving pretty fast,” said Brian Wingert.

    Crime insider sources says the suspect, whose name has not been released, is a Virginia Army National Guard Lieutenant and lives in the fan area. Sources say the Lieutenant is a commander with an engineering battalion at Fort Pickett.

    According to WKTR, no crashes or injuries were reported. Videos posted to social media appeared to show police cruisers involved in the pursuit giving the driver a wide berth, which was probably a good idea.

    Numerous sources made it clear that even if it resembles a “tank,” the vehicle in question is not.

    Instead, it appears to be an M577, a vehicle designed for use as a mobile command post by military officers or other support roles. According to Military Today, the M577 is a variant of the M113 troop transport that weighs approximately 11.6 tons and is lightly armored to protect against small arms fire and artillery shrapnel. The M113 family is a dated design that saw heavy use in the Vietnam War and is (slowly) being phased out in the US military, which just about squares with the kind of equipment National Guard units tend to get.

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  8. Cousin Dupree

    Cousin Dupree Platinum Member

    40mph :funny:
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  9. Sunburst

    Sunburst Bronze Member

    Soon to be "former member of the National Guard" after a court-martial....
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  10. Paradise

    Paradise Media Mod

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  11. Sunburst

    Sunburst Bronze Member

    Sibling Rivalry Strikes Again....http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...riting-book-poisoning-sisters-artichokes.html

    "A middle-class pensioner locked in an eight-year feud with her sisters has appeared in court accused of publishing a 'malicious' book about poisoned artichokes."
    The jury has been ordered to read the 213 page book before reaching a verdict.

    The court heard that the relationship between the defendant and the two sisters 'broke down irrevocably' in 2010 after Ms Glassett began living with their mother.

    The jury also heard that the defendant had sent threatening emails and sang offensive songs.
  12. Uno2Much

    Uno2Much Bronze Member

    Husband stops wife's stabbing attack by squirting ketchup on knife-wielding woman, police say
    By Katherine Lam


    A man stopped a knife-wielding neighbor stabbing his wife last week by squirting ketchup on the attacker, police said. The bizarre incident on May 31 began when Shalonda Latrice Shepard began banging on her neighbor’s door just before 2:45 a.m. at an apartment complex in Murfreesboro, Tenn., the Daily News Journal reported.
    When the couple opened the door, Shepard hurled a bowl of sugar at them, the police report stated. The angry neighbor then allegedly took out a steak knife and began stabbing the wife.

    Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/06/0...tchup-on-knife-wielding-woman-police-say.html


    Ketchup...the new self-defense weapon of choice. Don't leave home without it...but only if you have a cc (catsup carry) permit.
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  13. Paradise

    Paradise Media Mod

  14. Cousin Dupree

    Cousin Dupree Platinum Member

    It started out so sweetly too.
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  15. Uno2Much

    Uno2Much Bronze Member

    Is this guy for real? :panic:

    Driver in deadly hit-and-run crash says 'accidents happen,' and 'people hit and run people all the time'
    By Travis Fedschun | Fox News


    The crash happened around 12:50 p.m. on Commonwealth Avenue, where police said that Fitts struck the victim, a man in his 80's, and then kept driving. Police took Fitts in for questioning sometime after the crash but was released.
    Hours later, Boston 25 News reporter Drew Karedes found Fitts, who confessed on camera to leaving the scene of the crash after striking the man.
    Fitts spoke to Boston 25 News still wearing the disposable suit given to him during police questioning after his clothes were seized as potential evidence. The news station reported that police did not have enough evidence to arrest Fitts initially until he spoke to the Boston 25 reporter.

    Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2018/06/0...n-and-people-hit-and-run-people-all-time.html
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  16. Cousin Dupree

    Cousin Dupree Platinum Member

    I love it when idiots do things to get themselves convicted.
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  17. Sunburst

    Sunburst Bronze Member

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  18. Cousin Dupree

    Cousin Dupree Platinum Member

  19. Uno2Much

    Uno2Much Bronze Member

    He smoked meth and had a 'bad reaction.' So he asked cops for their help.
    June 13, 2018 07:54 PM


    The police report on Facebook states that the man told deputies that he'd purchased methamphetamine about a week earlier and had suffered a "violent reaction," after taking it.

    That's not all.

    The suspect went on to demand that detectives in the narcotics division test it for him to see if it was cut with something or if he'd been sold something else. If Kelly was indeed sold the wrong narcotic, the suspect said he wanted to "press charges" against the dealer.

    Read more: http://www.miamiherald.com/latest-news/article213135699.html
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  20. Cousin Dupree

    Cousin Dupree Platinum Member

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